Meditations of Lambchop

(What follows is some as yet unmatured generalisation about the nature of the sexes. Feel free to differ.)

Girls seem to flock together in a way that boys never do. At school, it always seemed like girls grouped together – impenetrable to any male influence.  Chances are, if you were a boy, you wanted to have an opportunity to speak to some girl, alone. But girls were never alone and approaching an entire flock of girls is a bit like approaching a pride of lions. A group of boys seems like a pack of meerkats in comparison – entirely innocuous.  I sometimes wonder if girls were surprised when boys didn’t approach them. They were unapproachable, except to the most brave (or the most stupid), or I suppose, the most popular.

It’s strange – girls seem to be both more false in their affections toward each other ( I remember girls always giving each other hugs at every opportunity and thinking that most of those hugs meant nothing) and have stronger group bonds. Boys seem unsophisticated by comparison, more honest, both more amicable and less gregarious.

I was thinking about this when I wrote the following poem (some years ago and after having left school):

Flocks of girls
Packs of girls
never Herds of girls – herds are controlled, led
Clusters of girls
not a Swarm – though girls do sting
Coalitions Consortiums Gangs Teams Broods
perhaps best to say
	a Charm of girls
a Bevy
a secret Cult to which no man or boy is admitted
a girl alone is a ploy
the giggle Covey is not far away
hugs
	and kisses
			and smiles
					and furtive looks
					(never stares)
beware the alpha female
	who tears off balls like cotton fluff
every man is alone when faced by
		the reactive
			destructive
				alluring power
		of that social molecular structure
all bonds between men are broken
they are dissolved in calm ocean eyes
trapped by the pack
		ravaged
		cast off as a brute
saying
	“men are such cowards
		would that they would
			stand up
				and fight
					for us.”